Otter pops

If you walk into the McDonalds bathroom and a guy has his foot up in the air under the hand dryer, it’s just me trying to thaw my feet out. Frozen feet and hands seem to be pretty much standard at this point. The temperature drop about a week ago signaled the last phase of the bike trip, so it’s time to get the hell home. Like every motorcycle trip Heath and I have been on, there’s always a point where home starts pulling at you and the fun starts to dwindle. I think we pretty much accepted that Indianapolis would be our last hoorah and the rest of the way would be a race against the impending cold. Knowing the camping would get torturous, we stopped by Alien Workshop in Dayton Ohio for some offloading of anything we thought wasn’t essential. Now with our bikes 30 pounds lighter, we could move way faster.

So I know previous to this post, there hasn’t been a whole lot of detail about the bicycling part of this bicycle trip. The truth is, once you make it through the getting-used-to-it period, the riding pretty much becomes repetitious and doesn’t seem worth mentioning until things change. Well, we’re back to making adjustments again. Finding the right combination of clothing to keep you from freezing, but not sweating is tough. Heath likes to error on the side of sweating all the way through his shirt because he wears a jacket the whole time. Seriously, from cuff to collar his denim shirt is dark blue, like he just finished a wet t-shirt contest.


When I first thought about doing this trip I scoured the internet for blogs about people who had done the same thing, but I didn’t find much, and more importantly, I didn’t feel like I found many people talking about the details and being honest about the shit that can make you love it or hate it. So, if anyone has any questions about anything related to this trip, write me an email at or leave a comment and we’ll answer them in a post coming up.

Columbus is definitely one of our favorite spots of the whole trip. We love food, and Columbus has tons of it. The highlight was Jeni’s Ice Cream. I would go as far as to say it might be the biggest winner of the journey, the Mcrib I ate today being the biggest let down. How can you advertise something so much that’s so shitty? And why would I even eat a Mcrib? Like most people, I’m more motivated by fear of loss (missing out) than what I can gain.

26 thoughts on “Otter pops

  1. road hazard you’re an idiot all kinds of people have successfully ridden across the country! they just aren’t on-line bragging about it.

  2. seriously what you guys are doing is cool I guess since you aren’t true cyclist. but you have the luxury of taking your time and clearly neither one of you has a real job. you’re probably both trust fund babies or something…I’m suprised you guys aren’t lying about all of the girls you’re getting on the trip too. I’m probably coming off as jealous but I take this thing kind of serious where you guys clearly don’t.

    1. Jealous….nah, you’re just an elistist who has no idea about the real world. If you spent just a fraction of the time you spend hating poeple and putting them down, instead getting off your uninspirational ass to actually do something ‘real’ yourself, you might figure out that blogging about ‘real life experiences’ (which clearly you’re a pussy and haven’t had any) isn’t about discussing technicalities of cycling, but making friends laugh about your adventures of cycling across country.

      Obviously you don’t realize that hardworking people don’t need handouts to make monumental shit happen. These men work their f%#king asses off, mostly 12 hour days 6 days a week. Let me guess, you’re middle aged and live with your mom and she’s on welfare? Clearly you’re incompetent and worthless so you don’t have enough money to do anything but sit on a computer and hate on people. It’s not surprising that someone like you living life vicariously, is so bitter.

      Perhaps you should stop “taking this thing (called life!) so seriously” and get off your uninspirational ass to do something real youself. Then please, blog about it, I’m sure you’re lame technical cycling blog will get over 100,000 hits…… cause that’s the witty, dynamic, humorous shit we all want to read about!

    2. To: cyclist unite

      Before you flame, know your facts.
      I personally know that Heath is not a “trust-fund baby”…far from it. He started from humble beginnings, skated everyday of his life since he was 10 years old, and earned everything he has by hard work and dedication. He is naturally athletic, and could have chosen several glam sports to excel in, but chose the lonely road of a skater.
      Heath has accomplished many firsts as a skater, and has achieved awards and accolades over his career, none of which he never mentions or talks about.
      Heath has maintained his humility and low profile throughout his life, and has obtained more success in his short professional career than most people achieve in a lifetime.
      If it were up to Heath, he would be riding this trip across country anonymously and virtually unknown. He’s riding because it’s a challenge, and he’s never backed down from anything difficult. Jeff is doing a great job documenting their trip through his tongue-in-cheek blogs and great photography.
      We’re all happy, Mr. cyclist unite, that you take your sport so seriously. Heath and Jeff have taken a cross-county trek and broken it down to it’s core basics: no fancy neon clothes, no special bicyclists’ power fuel bars to eat, no designer water bottles. Just two good ol’ fashioned American guys battling the elements and grinding it out day after day, and for the most part camping out in the country they are experiencing mile by mile.
      These two men are doing something that most of us will never accomplish in our lifetimes, and that’s living a dream.
      So with all due respect, cyclist unite, until you know your facts and have some respect for others’ accomplishments, please back the fuck off.

  3. Hi,
    First off your blog is awesome and I really admire what you guys are doing. I was wondering if Heath had come to a conclusion on what this trip was suppose to be about, which was figure out what he wanted to do with his life.

  4. First of all, these boys are far from trust fund babies, unlike you they are smart with their money, second yea they aren’t taking it seriously…they don’t shave their legs and are sponsored by Jelly Belly. If you are a true cyclist then you should be causing traffic jams with your swarm of other lame cyclists who obviously take it way too seriously, it’s Sunday, stop reading the blog and wasting your precious cyclist time. Oh yea and this isn’t for bragging rights buddy…its for fellow FRIENDS and FAMILY to read about, you just lurk online too much and somehow “came across it”. So go fuck your bright yellow Raleigh and post it somewhere…it would be way more interesting to look at then your stuck up comments.

    1. That was amazing. I was sitting here trying to think of something to say to that post but nothing i say could compare to what you just wrote. I think a lot of these people on here who bitch and complain about this trip are just sore b/c they realize that it isn’t as hard to ride a bicycle as they think. Jeff and Heath are definitely proving that if you are determined, you can do anything.

  5. Wow is the first word that comes to mind! To Cyclist Unite, ever think that maybe you take things too seriously? Your comments aren’t going to bring these guys down. Actually, I’m sure it did just the opposite. They probably laughed, shook their heads and kept on riding. Jeff and Heath I have enjoyed this journey with you through your words and photos. Thank you for sharing your adventure with us!

  6. The journey is the destination!
    Heath’s hat may have to go straight to the permanent collection at The MOMA after all is said and done! Make sure you snap an epic still life of it Vallee. Amazing pictures, awesome words. Enjoy dudes!

  7. Come on McRib? Imo, the only fast food worth stoppin for is “In & Out Burger” and “Chick Fil A.” am i wrong, anyone? Yeah i know youre on a bike so cant be picky. Question: whats your average daily budget on stuff: food, snacks, lodging, misc? Also, whats your most dangerous moment? Drivers are crazy out there imo, but i still want to do same one day.

    1. There are no In n Out’s past utah. Believe me, I know. And no, you can’t be picky, because some towns have one, maybe two places to eat.

  8. I also think it’d be cool to hear what music you guys have been listening to, or even what type of music. Awesome blog and “cyclist unite” you’re a tool.

  9. Just thought it odd that someone with the name Cyclist Unite would be the one to point out the fact that….wait…no one cares what he thinks. This isn’t for bragging rights. These two guys work by the sweat of their brow. In the time it takes someone like Cyclists Unite to pick out shaving cream for extra sensitive legs (you know, the kind in the pink can your gal buys), these dudes are righteously peddling miles and miles farther from the negativity he attempts to construe towards them.

    Keep it up, and if you decide to cycle back, maybe I’ll meet ya halfway, haha. 😀

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